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We’re getting into the summer, and money’s tight for many of us right now. If you’re a stay-at-home mom, a work-at-home mom, or any parent at home with your school-aged kids this summer, you may be yanking your hair out by the fistful by the middle of summer, if you’re not already. If this describes you, stop, take a deep breath, and read on to find no-cost ways to keep your kids happy while you keep your sanity. Here’s a list of some things to do with your young kids without even leaving the house. Okay, you might actually have to go out in the yard or walk around the block. Take a deep breath, you can do it!
- Bubbles. The old stand-by. Kids love ‘em, and if you don’t have a bottle of bubbles around the house (but who doesn’t?), you can make your own by diluting dish soap.
- Crafts. You can find great crafts on the internet or pick up a book or two at your local library.
- Go for a walk. Put on the sneakers and head out for a stroll around the neighborhood. It’s good exercise, and your neighbors will be thrilled to see the children.
- Eat dinner outside for a change. Make it something simple like deli sandwiches or hot dogs. Easy and fun. Use paper plates to make it even easier.
- Squirt gun battle! Who needs to pay $20 to go to the pool when you can run around in the yard, shooting each other with water for free? And catch some rays while you’re at it.
- Movie night. Pick a night when no one has to get up early the next morning, find a movie on TV or a video you already own, and camp out in the living room. Stay up late. The kids will think they’re getting away with something, and you’ll get some laid back bonding time with them.
- Play school. You can take notes, pay bills, or work on your laptop while they color or do worksheets. Search online for free printables for the kids to work on.
- Exercise. Pull out your favorite exercise video and ask the kids to join in. You’ll be killing two birds with one stone. You’ll get your workout in and ensure that your rugrats sleep well that night.
- Art time. Let them go nuts with construction paper, scissors, and glue. Throw in paper plates, brown bags, and coffee filters, and you’ve really got a party!
- TV. Come on, we all do it. Sometimes we just have to. Tell them to sit and watch a program or two while you do some work, and then you’ll go do one of the other fun things on this list with them!
Going out is fun, but let’s not forget that filling up the gas tank is the equivalent of a trip to the salon for a mani and pedi or some really great highlights. Let’s get our priorities straight here, folks! Use this list as a jumpstart to shaking up your routine a bit and helping you make it through the rest of summer without losing your mind.
The whole cliche that breaking up is hard to do is especially true during pregnancy. Perhaps you’ve been going to the same OB/GYN for years and really liked their bedside manner. Or maybe you just found the practice and took a chance. Whatever the case, if things aren’t progressing well with your doctor, then a break up is a necessary evil.
You and your doctor should be on the same page when it comes to prenatal care and birthing. For instance, if you are looking to have a natural, unmedicated delivery, your doctor or midwife should be a proponent of that style of birthing and be able to help you find the right information on natural pain management and appropriate classes. If they aren’t, then they probably aren’t the right medical pro for you.
So, how do you actuate this break up?
- Look for a new medical professional: ask friends, neighbors and coworkers for referrals. Research on the internet as well. Then make an appointment to interview the potential medical pro — either in person or on the phone. Make sure that their style lines up with your desires.
- Have your medical records transferred to the new office: This should take nothing more than a call to your old office (and perhaps a pick up of the records). You are entitled to your records, so they cannot say no.
- Enjoy your new practice.
I recently wrote about breaking up with your doctor on SheKnows. While researching for the article I was really shocked to discover how many women bravely took control of their medical care and broke it off with doctors and midwives who they didn’t see eye to eye with. With reasons ranging from a feeling that something just wasn’t right to certainty that their medical professional was pushing them in a medical direction that they didn’t want to go, these women knew what they wanted and went for it with their doctor. And I also learned that really, it doesn’t matter if you are 10 weeks or 39 weeks along: if the medical professional who is supposed to attend your birth isn’t right, then you shouldn’t stay with them. Period.
Have you broken up with your OB/GYN? Share in the comments
About a week and a half ago, a man crashed into my car while I was driving with my two young children. No one was hurt, thankfully. However, the man — rather than taking responsibility for not paying attention — has tried to say that I was driving unsafely since I swerved into the oncoming traffic lane (there was no oncoming traffic at the time) to avoid the crash. Thanks to my quick thinking, he only hit the rear of my car. It caused quite a bit of damage, but ultimately I am happier to have an undriveable car then to have had my children injured which would have happened otherwise.
My car is currently in the shop, being repaired. It’s probably going to be another two weeks before I get it back. In all, it will be nearly a month without a car for me. While that totally stinks, my husband and I have been making it work by sharing his car.
When I say we are making it work, I mean that we are doing our best. We live in a fairly rural area, too far from stores, shops and groceries to walk. And our road is busy, making strolls with the kids somewhat treacherous. Since I work at home, the commute isn’t an issue for me. However getting groceries, running errands and doing simple day-to-day tasks like going to the park are nearly impossible without a car. Meanwhile, my husband works about 40 minutes away, so it’s not possible to drop him off and pick him up everyday.
This all has meant that we have to be patient with each other and work together. Sharing a car is a complicated thing. Some days, I really need to go to the post office and get groceries. Somedays, my husband really needs the car to drive to meetings. Sharing isn’t a perfect system since ultimately there are times when one of us needs to sacrifice our needs for our partner’s needs … but that’s an important skill in life and in marriage.
For me, the sharing means prioritizing my requests for the car for the days that I truly need it — not just want it. (And let’s be honest — I want the car everyday!) I try to condense my needs and do as much as I can while I have the car. My husband has had to accept that his car isn’t just his for the time being and also be flexible about when he does and doesn’t have it. So far, we are doing pretty well with our sharing. But I am thankful that it’s not for the long term — we all need our own autonomy and our own ability to pick up and go as needed.
I would never wish this situation on anyone, but seeing that we can make something as tricky and complicated as this work has been a relationship affirming experience.
Summer is finally here and everyone’s schedule is exploding with things to do! The kids have games, practices, parties, and playdates, plus there are always doctor’s appointments and errands to run. Keeping everything straight can be almost impossible!
One of the best ways to stay organized and not forget an important event or appointment is to keep an updated calendar on the wall with everyone’s activities listed. Review the schedule at the beginning of the week and organize who will be responsible for running the kids to and from their various activities. As new things pop up, be sure to add them immediately to assure that something isn’t forgotten along the way.
Every night, check your schedule and gather together everything you will need for the next day. Lay out appropriate clothes for everyone and pack bags for day trips to the pool or beach, or lunches for day camp. With everything ready to go in the morning, there will be less running around before you have to be out the door. Check bags and other supplies in the morning to make sure that everything has what they need for the day.
If things are just too overwhelming, don’t be afraid to say “no” to invitations or extra classes and things that your children want to do. While letting them experience things and stay entertained is important, you all need some downtime now and then. Have designated days “off” throughout the summer, where everyone just stays home and relaxes. It will keep the kids from getting burned out and you from running yourself ragged.
By taking the steps needed to make your summer run a little more smoothly, you’ll be able to make the most of those busy days and take advantage of the lazy days of summer.
What are your best tricks for staying organized in the summer, amid the chaos and fun?
This is another one for you to share with your teenagers. If your teen is thinking about going to college but doesn’t see the benefit in it, share this article with them. A college degree is beneficial in so many ways, beyond the piece of paper.
You know that those with a college degree earn more, on average, than those without the piece of paper. But you’ll gain so much more from obtaining a college education than just the degree. I’ve learned this from personal experience and from countless conversations with students and from seeing the change in students from their first day in school to their graduation from community college two years later. The opportunity for growth is even greater for students pursuing a Bachelor’s or Master’s degree.
You Gain Interpersonal Skills
College teaches you skills that employers are looking for such as social skills, negotiating skills, and communication skills. You’ll gain these skills from having a roommate, living in the residence hall, joining clubs, having a part-time job, working on group projects, and obtaining leadership experiences. So get involved in activities beyond the classroom.
You’re More Flexible
People change careers more often these days. Not only are folks switching from one company to another, they’re actually following completely different career paths. With a college degree, you’re more flexible and can transition the skills you learn into various careers. I’ve done this myself, actually. I firmly believe it’s the writing skills I learned in college that have allowed me to transition from the traditional workplace as a college adviser to the life of a work-at-home mom freelancer.
You Get To Know Yourself
Life experience, in general, gives us perspective and self-knowledge. The time you spend in college will expose you to many new experiences that will shape the person you become. It was my freshman year of college that I took American National Government and learned that my political beliefs were radically different than those of my parents, the views I had been exposed to my entire life. Getting out on your own in college can expose you to experiences that may yield similar results.
You’ll Make Lifelong Connections
Many people meet the person they will marry in college. I did. College is also a popular place for making lifelong friendships. It’s also a great place to begin networking. You’ll make connections with peers and faculty that can benefit your career and personal life down the road.
There are so many other advantages to earning your college degree. Visit GetDegrees.com to read about many more!
Keeping our kids off the internet these days is like telling them they aren’t allowed to breathe. Whether they are doing research for school, playing games, or connecting with their friends on sites like MySpace, preteens and young teens are online as much as they are allowed to be. Most sites geared toward kids in this age bracket have safety measures in place, parents still need to take steps to protect their children when they are online.
There are many programs available online that can help you to monitor your children’s internet activity and block sites that are inappropriate. Antivirus software often offers parental controls, as do some internet providers. Separate programs can be found for download or purchase online. Many will track instant message text, emails, and passwords, allowing you to closely monitor your child’s internet activity.
Keeping the computer in a central area is another good way to keep an eye on what your kids are up to online. Knowing that mom or dad could walk by at any moment may keep them from breaking rules about who they can contact online, or what sites they are allowed to participate in.
Educate your children about the dangers of talking to strangers online. While sheltering them from the harsh realities of the real world might be the most tempting thing to do, by letting them know that the 12 year old kid that lives a few towns over might just be a criminally minded adult, intent on harming them, may be a deterrent to giving out personal information.
Lead by example. If you have online profiles, protect yours as well. If you post pictures, make sure that they are kept private and access is only given to people that you trust. Be prudent about just how much personal information you give out online, and take care if you choose to meet up with online friends.
What kind of monitoring and safety precautions do you have in place for your own children’s online activities?
Photo credit: sxc.hu - mzacha
Father’s Day is this Sunday and there are so many great things the kids can do themselves that their dads will absolutely treasure! Here are a couple of ideas I’ve found searching around online.
1. Tent Card from Kaboose. My husband is a scoutmaster so I’ve had my eye on this project for a while. He loves camping and the kids loves camping with him. It is an activity they all enjoy together and this would mean a lot to him coming from them. The instructions are fairly simple and including a picture of the family is a nice touch.
2. Duct Tape Wallet from Family Fun. It is hard to find a man that isn’t a fan of duct tape. Dads will appreciate the blast from the past knowing that their kids “McGuyver’d” a present. This one would be great for the 10 and up kids to make.
3. Handprint Frame and Bookmark from Amazing Moms. This is something even your smallest children can participate with. The kids love getting their hands dirty doing the prints and the dads will love having this keepsake. I like the idea of the fingerprint bookmark. It is smaller and is something the dads can use on a regular basis.
Whatever you choose to do this weekend for Father’s Day, remember that the most important thing is to let them know that they are loved and appreciated! What are your plans for Father’s Day?
Christy Nelson blogs about crafts and family management here at Family Eden. You can also find her sharing craft tutorials, projects, and hosting a monthly craft challenge at her website, christynelson.net.
When you have a toddler in the house, inevitably you will have some bad behavior from time to time. Of course, with this age group, it’s hard to get them to understand the behavior and consequences. This is especially hard when they’re purposely trying to be defiant to test their boundaries.
At our house, we struggled at first to figure out a way to discipline our daughter effectively. Both my husband’s culture and mine traditionally spank children as a form of discipline. It was the way we grew up. However, we didn’t really want to go down that route as our primary discipline method.
Of course, we had heard of time outs, but truthfully didn’t know how to put them into effect. After watching many episodes of Super Nanny, I figured we could give it a try.
We may not always follow these steps exactly, but we try our best to be consistent. Here is our standard time out routine.
- Give a warning that if behavior doesn’t stop, time out will begin.
- If behavior continues, we take her to a designated corner and explain that time out has begun.
- Time outs last 1 minute per year of age. For example, my daughter is 3 so her time outs last 3 minutes.
- Once the time out period is over, we explain to her why she was in time out and ask for apology.
- At this point, we try not to dwell on the situation so that the crying or whining doesn’t continue.
What discipline method(s) have you found work best for you and your kid(s)?
Melanie Edwards is a Modern Mami™. As a latina working mother, she provides an honest depiction of the everyday humor and drama in the life of today’s wife, mother and woman from a Latina perspective. She often blogs about the special concerns working mothers have in attempting to achieve a work-life balance. Melanie has been married six years and has a 3-year-old daughter.
Newborns love the feeling of being swaddled. Swaddling is a way of wrapping a baby tightly in order to help them feel secure. It makes sense that babies would like this position because it helps to keep their limbs from flailing, warms them, and recreates a feeling similar to being in the womb. However, swaddling is an art form that can sometimes be confusing and frustrating, especially to brand new parents functioning on very little sleep.
I swaddled my first two children, but only for a short time. I could never quite get the hang of it and soon gave up. I didn’t think babies enjoyed being swaddled for more than the first couple weeks, anyway. It was during my third pregnancy that a friend recommended The Happiest Baby on the Block: The New Way to Calm Crying and Help Your Newborn Baby Sleep Longer
You Need the Right Tools
Those receiving blankets you get from the hospital are all well and good for laying on the ground or covering baby up in the car seat, but they’re simply not big enough for swaddling. My friend gave me SwaddleDesigns Organic Ultimate Receiving Blanket
You Need to Wrap the Baby Tightly
For an easy to understand tutorial on how to swaddle a baby, check out this article from Parents.com. The thing to remember is to be sure you make your swaddle snug and secure. In order for the wrap to be effective, the baby’s arms should remain snugly at her sides. Don’t worry about making it too tight; she’ll let you know if she’s not comfortable.
You Need to Know the 5 S’s
From my experience, for swaddling to be truly effective, it must be combined with the 5 S’s from The Happiest Baby on the Block: The New Way to Calm Crying and Help Your Newborn Baby Sleep Longer
Swaddling does take practice, especially when combined with the other S’s. But once you’ve got it down, you’ll come to rely on the practice to calm your little one every time. Have you used this technique with success? If you decide to give it a try, let me know how it works for you!
Before my husband and I celebrated our first anniversary, my mother-in-law’s husband left her and they started on the path to divorce. Since then, I have seen a friend married to the man she thought she wanted to be with forever … and then divorced when he cheated on her. Now, as we approach our fifth anniversary, we each have friends who are sorting through the complexity and horror of divorce.
It’s a hard road to walk, watching your closest of friends be blind-sided by spouses who feel that it’s okay to just walk away from a marriage, kids or no kids. From Jon & Kate Plus Eight to our own circle of friends, we are surrounded by divorce, unhappiness and uncertainty in relationships. It’s like we just happened on a minefield this year, and are having to tread softly through it, avoiding the pitfalls and traps that are catching those around us.
I’m not sure how you could not wonder why it is that it seems like so many marriages are on the rocks.
Is it the economy? Is the stress of downward spiraling finances causing couples to fight more and ultimately lose touch with each other? Are all these marriages really destined for failure with partners who just were ill-suited for living the forever life? Was everyone brain-washed into believing that if they didn’t find the one and marry right up, they’d be alone forever? Is it just a coincidence of timing?
Or is it something else? A close friend suggested that the rash of divorces that are striking all around us are born from a new American reality that declares anything that isn’t an instant success as a failure. That certainly sounds plausible with the way some relationships are ending virtually overnight. Maybe people are becoming too lazy to follow through with all the work that comes with the wedding bands. Maybe people would rather take the easy way out rather than working hard to make a marriage work.
I don’t have the answers.
But I do know one truth. The truth is that marriage isn’t something that you abandon like an old cell phone or a discarded banana peel. It’s something that you work at continuously, nurturing, trying, hoping and hopefully thriving. It’s something that you keep trying and keep trying and keep trying at … Like a garden, you need to cultivate it, pull the weeds and remember to water it and make sure it has enough sunlight. If you forget, then the weeds will choke out the plants, leaving an ugly mess.
Certainly, every marriage isn’t destined for success. But I wonder if my friend is right: are some marriages being abandoned prematurely — marriages that could be successes if only people didn’t succumb to idea that if it’s not instantly gratifying then it’s not built to last.
What do you think?